Mother's Day is coming. Does that make you sad? Or have you numbed yourself to the pain, because it's too much. I wouldn't blame you. I can't imagine the raw emotion that you have felt. I can't imagine your loss. All the reminders that you are a mother are gone. There are no little hands tugging on your shirt, no cries of "Mama" in the night. No one will bring you flowers this weekend. But that does not change the fact that you are a mother. You will always be a mother. Cupcake's mother.
Do you think about her? She thinks of you often. She has questions that I cannot answer. I can only guess. From the facts that I have, I can only deduce that life is hard for you. Whether it was choices you made or things that were forced upon you, makes no difference to me.
I only hope that you will one day meet the Healer of Souls. I pray that He would seek you out and restore your life. He will forgive you and give you hope. May He redeem all the ugly, awful evil that has happened to you and make it a thing of beauty. His name is Jesus, and He loves you with a pure, everlasting love.
As for your daughter, she is safe. She is loved. She is growing like a weed. She is learning to read. She can count to 240 and go even higher. More importantly, she is learning to trust, to ask forgiveness and to forgive. She is beautiful, inside and out.
Thank you for being her mother and for giving her a chance at life.
God bless you,